By admin | September 1, 2010
By Richard Allen
It was well documented a few weeks ago that NASCAR had fined some of its drivers for making comments and social networking posts the heads of the sport deemed detrimental. Virtually every major professional sports league has done that very thing at one time or another so to hear that NASCAR had done it was not necessarily surprising. It was just unusual that the organization had attempted to do it secretly in a sport that has long been known for its inability to keep secrets.
With all that said, I have compiled a list of things NASCAR ought to consider fining drivers and others for in the future. Here are those things:
1. Any driver who gets out of his car after a finish of any place other than first and says, â€œIt was a good points day for usâ€ should be fined $100,000 and have all driver and owner points for that day taken away for not understanding that fans donâ€™t want to hear how great his 6th place run was.
2. Any driver who gets out of his car after a wreck and says, â€œMy spotter didnâ€™t tell meâ€¦â€ should be fined $50,000 and made to drive that same wrecked car in the next race for not understanding that it is he and not the spotter driving the car.
3. Any driver who gets out of his car after a race and says, â€œIf I only had one more lapâ€ should be fined $25,000 for not understanding that the race distance is posted before hand, and besides, many of these races go extra distance anyway so there is no reason for such a statement.
4. Any driver who after a confrontation with another driver says, â€œIâ€™m sure weâ€™ll text each other and work it outâ€ will be fined $1,000 per letter for any text or social networking post made in the upcoming week.
5. Any driver who shows up for a driver introduction with a spotless uniform and no grease under his fingernails will be fined $25,000 for not understanding he works in a sport that inherently requires grease on clothes and hands.
6. Any driver who complains about the comfort of his motor coach and/or the parking space of said coach will be fined $25,000 and made to stay the entire weekend in the seediest motel within 100 miles of the track.
7. Any driver who complains about his flight to a track in his private jet will be fined $25,000 and will be made to travel home on the worst looking bus that can be found.
8. Any TV or radio personality who mentions fuel mileage before the halfway point of any race will be made to drive home with half the amount of gas as would normally be required so that he or she will have to drive at a ridiculously slow speed with hundreds of angry race fans bearing down on him or her.
As you can see, there is a great deal of sarcasm in this post. However, perhaps NASCAR would be well served to consider some of these things nonetheless.
Follow @RacingWithRich on twitter.
Richard Allen is a member of the National Motorsports Press Association. His weekly columns appear in The Mountain Press and The Knoxville Journal.
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