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With the ‘Drive for Five’ complete, Johnson’s next campaign will need a catchy slogan

By admin | December 1, 2010

By Richard Allen

Now that Jimmie Johnson has successfully completed the ‘Drive for Five’ it is time for he and his team to turn their attention to the all important task of coming up with a catchy slogan for his quest of a sixth consecutive title in 2011.

Perhaps during his championship acceptance speech this weekend at the NASCAR Sprint Cup banquet in Las Vegas the reigning champ may want to go ahead and unveil the catchphrase for his efforts in 2011 as he seeks yet another title. Here are a few suggestions:

The “We Need A Six Fix” Tour- At least one suggestion has to involve the number six and some word that rhymes with six, right?

The “Are You Tired Of Me Yet?” Tour- Many NASCAR fans had had enough of Johnson and his Hendrick Motorsports team when they scored championship number two or three. Now the level of frustration has risen to unforeseen heights. For those fans this would be the perfect final straw phrase.

The “I Can’t Remember When I Wasn’t Champ, Can You?” Tour- As an accompaniment to the above mentioned slogan this could be added as a filler for the back of any T-shirt used to advertise the five time champ’s campaign.

The “Now We’re Filling Out The Other Hand” Tour- Years ago during the era of Terry Bradshaw, ‘Mean’ Joe Greene and those other legendary Pittsburgh Steelers they used the phrase “One For The Thumb” after they had already acquired four Super Bowl rings. Since Johnson and team have surpassed the accomplishments of the Bradshaw era Steelers by filling an entire hand with championship rings, this slogan would seem fitting.

The “Baby Or No Baby, I Can Still Win” Tour- In what proved to be the year of the newborn in NASCAR, Johnson showed that late night feedings and poopy diapers aren’t enough to slow him down. The hand that rocks this cradle is filled with championship rings(See above).

The “Facial Hair Doesn’t Matter” Tour- Johnson has now won championships sporting a beard and clean shaven. This year he may wish to wear a 1970’s style mustache, perhaps even with handlebars. Or maybe a goatee and shaved head will be in order. Whatever the facial coverage, it doesn’t seem to matter. And recently, crew chief Chad Knaus has been spotted with scruff growing on his face. That won’t matter either.

The “Champion For Life” Tour- Why not just forget all this championship stress and concede the inevitable. By naming Johnson ‘Champion for Life’ NASCAR and the television networks could get back to promoting one race at a time rather than place so much emphasis on what has become and unstoppable force.

Having offered these suggestions, I want it to be known that I will expect my share of royalties from any sales based on these slogans.

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Here are other columns you may find interesting:

Hendrick moves not made solely for purpose of appeasing Junior, Gordon

Gustafson may offer Gordon his last shot at championship glory

What is the significance of five championships in a row?

Will strong finish by Edwards result in 2011 success

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3 Responses to “With the ‘Drive for Five’ complete, Johnson’s next campaign will need a catchy slogan”

  1. Susie Says:
    December 3rd, 2010 at 9:11 am

    How about the “Nascar fix for six”?

  2. Gordon82Wins Says:
    December 3rd, 2010 at 11:58 am

    “No one’s better for ten races!”

  3. Kbfan18 Says:
    December 9th, 2010 at 9:48 am

    Reaching for a 6 pack